I have a new found respect for people who go to the gym and work out on a daily basis. I have recently started this routine that makes even urination a painful task. People who have a ‘fab’ body don’t have it easy.
List of sacrifices (‘cos I love to make lists) :-
1. Sleep. Working out in the morning is ideal, which requires you to miss the world cup matches in the night and wake up before your doodh wala.
2. ‘Good’ food – The definition of good may be subjective but in my world good food is everything your doctor/dietician tells you not to eat and vice versa.
3. Dignity. There are certain exercise postures, which if combined with weights can make even an ugly fat woman with really big pimples cringe. Also spreading your legs in public is not just in a hooker’s job description. Some fitness machines are designed to give you that ‘hooker’ experience. The wider you spread your legs, the better. Remember that.
4. Movement. Your muscles have been pulled and stretched beyond its capacity that your movements are restricted to only breathing in and out, although if you’re really lucky and your trainer let you off easy, you could squeeze in a couple of blinks once in a while.
List of benefits (‘cos there’s always gain in pain)
1. Clothes. Gone are the days when your mom had to stand outside the trial room and fetch you the ‘XXXL’ size when ‘XXL’ was giving you breathing problems. Now you go straight for the ‘S’ size and feel sorry for the fat chick in the trial room next to you.
2. Confidence. Your posture exhibits a sense of pride and confidence. You don’t have to bend your shoulder or hold your breath to hide the tummy weight from bystanders.
3. Strength/Stamina. Cardio increases your stamina and weight training increases your strength. A combination of both makes you want to punch someone at random and start a riot.
4. Compliments/attention. Initially you’ll get compliments about your weight loss from people who’ve seen your ‘before’ being transformed into your ‘after’. What follows compliments is the attention and ‘top to bottom’ checkouts.
5. Victory. If you recently broke up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, there’s no question he/she is going to regret it the second he/she looks at your new and improved avatar. That’s victory for me.
So now that I’ve started working out and all, let me just save us both some time – I’m too good for you bud.
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