Help thyself!

If you see people around you doing things that you always wanted to do and that too way better than you could ever do it – that makes you Wolowitz in the eyes of Sheldon Cooper (wow!, I’m on a roll with Big Bang references). And if you ever think about confessing such feelings to your “friend”, then let me be your angel sent from above and stop you from committing the second biggest mistake of your life (first, being reading this post, but it’s too late for that now!). No, this does not change even if your bestie is great at giving pep talks! They’ll merely rip off some author, who writes Self-help books for a living and it goes without saying, I don’t care for a self-help book. If you think about it, it’s kinda like porn for the learned (only resorted to when you have no alternatives – in short, when you conclude that, “you’re a loser, who just can’t get some!”).

I’ve read a couple of self-help books in the past, not because I thought I was a loser but because “someone” insisted that I must read the book to gain a different perspective on life and ipso facto turnaround my apparently not-so dead-end life. Long story short, I read the first two chapters and then Google(d) for some really dirty curse words for the author and that “someone” for bringing the book into my life and making it even worse than it already was.

It’s no coinkidink that these best-selling books only talk about success stories of people starting businesses and finding their true passion, and not too many failure stories, or the failures are dressed up as a stepping stone to success, or a temporary hurdle.

It’s just another way of banking on people’s insecurity and lack of confidence. You want to feel good about yourself? This is what you do:

1) Stop watching TV shows like Doogie Howser, M.D, Prison Break and yeah my personal favourite, The Big Bang Theory, which screams, “You’re Stupid!”.

2) Don’t take your boyfriend to “Silver Linings Playbook” – The movie. You know, he’s gonna like Jennifer Lawrence better than you sweety.

3) Subscribe to all the newsletters out there. An inbox full of emails everyday will make you feel important.

4) Add 20 bucks somewhere in the balance sheet and ask your manager to figure out the difference.

5) And yeah what the heck, help an old lady to cross the street, wouldn’t kill you, right?

Here’s to helping thyself! Cheers!!

“If the self-help books worked, it would be a shrinking industry not a growing one.” – Steve Maraboli

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4 thoughts on “Help thyself!

  1. Error 404: girlfriend not found
    Anyway, about the success stories. .It would be fun to read about some one who joined an MNC, had fun in the ‘honeymoon’ period.. then got his/her ass handed to them by starting with lowly jobs and condescending glances from the seniors.. How said person rose up the ladder, dealt with shitty bosses, poor appraisals, jumped jobs, and what not.. Why can’t we have that?

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    • I just dislike reading about philosophical theories about what you should do to have a successful career or marriage or anything for that matter. Its just like some baba preaching his teachings to me. It has no value in real life where scenarios change every second and there is no self help book that can cover all scenarios for you.

      Like

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